Commencement of Resistentialist Writings and the Haunting Words of David Lynch

The punishment for incorrectly typing the password is a brutal shaking from side to side
So don’t screw it up!

Just kidding
You really don’t need to be so careful
You can always rewrite it

Okay
Now
I need to practice what I preach, instead of preach

So I finally (finally? It has been about a week!) started my resistentialist story - rather, I sat trembling in fear until I could muster up the tiniest bit of courage to begin typing, and once I did I liked nothing that I wrote. I had done a bit of brainstorming prior and ideas had come easily to me; tons of ideas, big ideas, enough ideas to branch into other ideas and procreate with other ideas so that I'd have enough ideas to write a full-length novel. But, with so many ideas that I like (that I want to respect and express well) I have become too damned fearful of screwing them up while transcribing them. So, in my severe cautiousness and over sensitive criticism, I failed to put much down, like much what I had written, and, worst of all, enjoy what I was doing. [I recently watched the documentary Lynch in which the director said something like "If you don't like the doing, you're in the wrong line of work," scolding the notion of a 'tortured artist' and promoting his transcendental meditation driven 'feel good' work ethics. The line has haunted me since and I have worried over every work thinking Is this really what I want to do? Does this make me happy?]
Is it that I'm trying to find any easy way out (what some have called the 'problem with our generation,' that is, we are afraid to work hard)? That may be true, but I don't think this dilemma is at the heart of my issue. Is it that I am afraid of failure? That might be more like it. Do I like the prospect of being an artist but not the creative-constructive process itself? No, now that is just the fear talking. I have always known what I wanted to generally, but know that I have a specific my dreams have become more concrete, solid, and less abstract and fluid, thus they have become more fragile. But I should not fear this transmutation, I should embrace it. I currently have the inspiration to turn something I've always idealized into something real, something I could use, and I should not let a fear of failure restrict that.
I need to remember, just because it has become more solid DOES NOT MEAN THAT I CAN'T STILL CHANGE IT, I CAN! I can edit, I can delete, I can re-write, but I can't re-write if I write nothing in the first place. I need to remember, it is only a first draft - I should just let the ideas flow and cast off my inhibitions. I must get naked and roll around in paint. I must sleep a lot and meditate. I must have a healthy diet and an optomistic outlook. I must be free to all kinds of experimentation. I must smile, ALWAYS! I must subscribe to davidlynch.com and support his advertisement-free web page with my annual pledge of [some unGodly amount of money] and buy his Signature Cup and drink it everyday. You know what they say... if you ain't happy wit 'er, erase 'er head! Ahahaha...